Bismallahirrahmanirrahim. In the name of God, the most kind, the most merciful.
With these words begin 113 out of 114 Suras in Quran, holy book of Islam...
In the name of God... God - christians, jews and muslims share.. Cause basically it's the same god.. And by calling terrorists continue their crusade [what an irony] against western world...
There's a claim, that terrorists might use so-called dirty bomb. Dirty bomb generates not as much blast, as radioactive waste in form of nuclear fallout.. I'm afraid. For myself, people I care about, for other fellow countrymen... I'm counting days till April 28th. Economic Forum is due to take place in Warsaw on 28-30th of April, making it very good target for any terrorist group. One attack could wipe out political and economical elites of the western world.. I bet that's tempting... I'm going away days before said Forum, I will return few days after it's over. I hope I will have something to return to. I hope I will find everything in order, as I left it behind. I can only hope nothing will happen.
But I know that since we were involved in Bush crusade we will have to face consequences.. :(

group blog therapy

I stopped by blog.pl to read Wszyscy Tacy Sami.. I browsed newest additions to other totally random blogs. And you know what.. it reminds me of Group Hug.. A bunch of whining people [hey, like me! :D] writing stuff that usually noone reads. Intelectual pornography. Some people sharing their life and feeling in an erzatz of a diary for other people who gain their pleasure from peeping into other people lifes. I know why I don't read other people diaries - none of my friends run a diary. And I don't care about people I don't know. I only follow blogs that feature comic strips, novels or short stories. And why do I keep running blog? It's a form of a therapy, slash bit of megalomania... ;D
Anyway.. I have to find aunt's phone number and call her up... and I have to plan my vacation.. uh.. and work.. yeah :D

Mixmaster VJ :P

So. As I was saying I played around with VJ stuff. Effect: I have small amateur studio at home :D It occupies my hellishly small desk. I have Videonics MX-1 mixer, preview on small 14 inch tv, output on the 21 inch tv above my head [not seen in the picture], vcr, generic colour pattern and computer as sources.. Not much but it's still something to play with. All those transitions, wipes, zooms, p-i-p's, and so on are very much fun. I feel like a kid. Wheee. Now I have to find GPI cable to connect video mixer to the pc to add titles without titler or sumperimposing it in other way. I wish I had my old mac. I've read that it has GPI port and it could easily 'talk' to it plus I'd have additional source.. Oh well. Best thing about this mixer is that output from the computer is stable. No shaking, no interlace, no nothing. Purrrrfect :D

Things to do in Warsaw when you're dead

OK, it's not about movie with Andy Garcia... Apart from the fact that I'm watching it at the moment. Girl in the picture is Gabrielle Anwar and she is ab-so-lu-te-ly beautiful. No wonder she was dubbed one of the '50 most beautiful people in the world' by People magazine. If you haven't seen 'Things to do in Denver when you're dead' you should. It's a decent movie, with great cast. Buscemi, Christopher Lloyd and Christopher Walken to name few.
In other news. I went to this rave gig yesterday. It was much fun, I got hung on vj's computer.. and I think they won't let me into dj's booth anymore :D It's a shame, cause I'm just another asshole who likes to hang out in dj booth with dj's, promoters and groupies :) Oh hell, it was fun :D Anyhoo, It's almost 3 AM and I think I should go to sleep instead of watching the movie. I have to be at work at 9... crap :/

Till then, bye bye

Flag-wavers vs. whistle-blowers

One of the greatest economists of our times, Dr Francis Fukuyama, author of The End of History and The Last Man said in recent interview that Bush administration reminds him of Lenin. But what does that mean for us? Does it mean that next will be new Stalin? Some call Bush Stalin, Hitler already, but I think there's a difference between devouted Christian, who in name of God launches crusade against followers of other religion.. and Hitler.. :> Nah, I'm just kidding. Bush is not after genocide of arabic nations. It's all about Benjamins. He doesn't want to have 'lebensraum' in 'Sauditenland'. And I sometimes that sometimes he really do believe that what he does is right and justified.

But Bush policy raised a lot of questions, not only after infamous 9/11 but from the start. I'm watching closely what's going on in USA. Me as well as number of fellow Europeans. We watch.. in shock and awe.. We are afraid of new Lenin. We are afraid of imposing democracy and bringing it on tanks. We don't like when someone openly supports one regime and overthrows the other. We are not stupid, and maybe it's a hipocrisy... maybe we do have too many skeletons in our closets to judge others.. But I think we have learned that playing God is just not right. And I think in present times world gaining pace require fast learners.
World supporting USA is splitted between flag wavers and whistle blowers. I really think USA need more whistle blowers.. while Europe actually need more flag wavers. Now it's all but in balance. USA has such people as Michael Moore and Noah Chomsky. On the other side of the Atlantic I don't see flag wavers that don't fall under 'fascist' or 'bigot' category.

Yeah.. she is..

Hey. It's funny.. [kinda] new funny song.. from guys from Texas.. Punk rock in Texas? State where clubs close at 2 AM? Well.. everything is possible apparently.. :> I like this song, especially video. Be sure to check out the lyrics... and still of the girl in video.. Yummy.. Gotta love... those big.. eyes.. :>

More words.. more lyrics... aishiteimasu

Few things that I keep playing.. in random.. dunno why :)

Gary Jules - Mad World
Radiohead - Karma Police
Kenny Rogers - Gambler
Pizzicato Five - Baby Love Child

They put me in a kinda special mood.. well.. sometimes..

Taxicab confessions

Someone said once that taxi driver are different breed of people. On every altitude and longitude cabbies are perceived as
1) thieves
2) people you feel comfortable talking to about most intimate of intimate.

From time to time I travel by cab. Usually I take taxi when I'm in a hurry
or when I'm too drunk/*.* to travel by bus, or other means of transportation. And as everyone I tend to talk to drivers. Recently though I discovered that as much as I have an urge to talk to driver, so does he. For last few weeks, whenever I'm getting on a cab I wait for driver to kick off conversation. And they usually do. They just can't stand quiet customer I guess. After few blocks I hear something like 'So, how was the party, I understand you're coming home from a club', or 'How 'bout them [insert sport team name here] last match', 'ave you erd what that [insert politician name here] said/did recently? That bastard' or simply 'How 'bout weather, oh it's been raining whole morning, the road is all slippery'... Aaaand here starts the conversation.
If I don't respond or dismay them with 'I don't know/care' they usually shut up and don't bother with talking to me... but sometimes they just can't stop talking. They go on and on...
They really are different breed of people.. Really annoying one. Yet, I think you have to be in some way or the other open as a cab driver and be willing to not only listen but also eager to speak..

Pieprzony Madryt, pieprzony angielski

Wkurzylem się. 11 marca wkurzył mnie.
Przybyłem do pracy. Dzień jak codzień. Przeklikałem się przez pocztę,
w której jak zwykle ktoś chciał mi powiększyć penisa, sprzedać
Xanax, Viagre i masę antydepresantów opartych na fluoksetynie..
Potem czas na wiadomości.. z kraju i ze świata..
Madryt.
Bomba.
140 ofiar.. 150.. 160..
Telefon.. sms.. 'czy wszystko w porzadku?' 'tak'.. uff...
Niezasłużone nerwy... W imię czego? Nie chce mi się o tym myśleć, mówić...
Nie chcę... To tyle jeśli chodzi o Madryt..

Kolejny weekend :) Odreagować trzeba :)

it's been a while since I could see this clear.

Hey. I've been watching 'X-ray vision' flash movie in the inniki's home page. And it came to me that I owe youssa an update.

The title for this post comes from the 'X-ray vision'. That's what I do recently. Surf the web looking for funnies. For something to cheer me up. Recently my life got into this spin. It goes I've reached new low when it comes to terms of money problems.
It got me so bummed I couldn't write anything about what's was going on, since my mind was focused on not focusing on money matters.. In other words - it is all really weird for me these days.

I'm over 6000 euro debt, and I had to loan money from family, bank and friends to repay it. I try to keep it together and keep going.
I will get thru it. I always do, yet it is annoying beyond reason.

... so this is how it's like these days.. blah..

Who's in the axis of evil?

Crap. I thought those bad ass countries were worse.
I've read recently an interesting report from CIA regarding 'Nations hospitable to organized crime and terrorism'.

But I've learned that Canada has become a threat to USA.. Why you ask? Well...:
"A generous social-welfare system, lax immigration laws, infrequent prosecutions, light sentencing, [...] These factors combine to make Canada a favored destination for terrorists and international organized crime groups."

.. OK, so I guess many terrorists will be attracted by good social-welfare, pension plan, free healthcare.. that's pure nonsense if you ask me. And what do you mean by infrequent prosecution or light sentencing? USA has the highest rate of people in prison per capita. 700 out of 100,000 citizens is doing jail time at the moment. Does it really works? Countries with high imprisoned rate per capita are safer? Mob rulled Russia has over 650, Belarus rulled by despotic dictator has over 500. Canada has only 100... 7 times less.. And which country is more peaceful? Canada or USA?

"First, as a modern liberal democracy Canada possesses a number of features that make it hospitable to terrorists and international criminals. The Canadian Constitution guarantees rights such as the right to life, liberty, freedom of movement, freedom of speech, protection against unreasonable search and seizure, and protection against arbitrary detention or imprisonment that make it easier for terrorists and international criminals to operate."

Waaait a minute.. let me copy&paste two things:

Amendment I
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.

Amendment IV
The right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.

I am speechless.. so basic human rights that were base of the Amendments to the US constitution are threat now? They aid to terrorist activities? WHAT THE HELL?

Countries like Belarus are potrayed as problematic. With corruption crippling government, drug smuggling mafia, and little arm deals with rogue countries. Yet Canada seems to be comfortable country to harbour terrorists.. And why? Cause it's democratic country with freedom of speech and gathering... Has Patriot Act and other acts introduced since then, done it's job already? US has no internal threat cause it become non-free country?
I think this report is one more wake up call for people in USA.
You are treated like cattle.
'War is peace, freedom is slavery, ignorance is strenght'.
Doesn't ring a bell? Read Orwell's 1984.

I'm going to Dante's Inferno...

Well according to this test, I'm doomed for eternity in Dante's Inferno's the First Level of Hell - Limbo!
Here is how I matched up against all the levels:

Level	Score
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)	Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)	Very High
Level 2 (Lustful)	High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)	Moderate
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)	Very Low
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)	Low
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)	High
Level 7 (Violent)	High
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)	Low
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)	Low

Take the Dante's Inferno Hell Test

Another allnighter :D

Mexican movie marathon. 20/02/04, Warsaw/Poland. Interensted? Click here.. oy :D

Info is in polish only, go figure why :P :D

drinking absinth at Agatha's home

I'm listening to U2

I wish it was summer... 1998...
I wish I was by the lake.
I wish I was eighteen again
I wish I had all the hair I had back then
I wish I had to walk for miles to find next nearest town
I wish I I had nothing to do
I wish many things
that noone can give me
I wish I had walked 10 miles for no reason
I wish I had walked 5 miles to buy pizza
I wish I was there
I wish I was then
I wish to be... what I used to be.
I wish I had.. the chances I had to change my life and be happy again
I wish it was the way it was.
I would be different.

no one would care. but I would be

but I still haven't found what I'm looking for

eot. drunk jackal. absinth rules.

Till then, bye bye :)

Paranoid Android

Hey, it's Marvin! Douglas Adams "Paranoid Android"... Sometimes I feel Marvin. Not that I'm always discontent with life, but I feel like people really don't like to have me around cause I whine to much.

Life, loath it or ignore it, you can't like it - this and other Marvin quotes remind me some of the stupid things I say when I'm upset that may piss or upset other people.

... do you want me to be your plastic friend?

I'm listening to Garou and I'm thinking about girls...
Men sing a lot about how great girls are, how we cherish them and love them..
Girls sing usually that either men are pigs or that they are gonna ditch one guy to find another..

musicplasma : Coolest site I've found in a long time

OMG, I can't find words to describe how great this site is. Idea is simple: use Amazon API, connect artists by 'recommendation' feature, combine it with sales as popularity.. voila.. But when you see it in action it's simly amazing.

If anyone could combine such site with Napster, Music Match and Kazaa that would be the definite guide to music genre. I've already searched around, and it seems this little gizmo is right most of the time. I like bands that are within tha halo of the certain band, I've heard or have albums of the artist on the orbit.. try it yourself.. You'll love it as much as I did.. ttyl

Personality Disorder Test

Here are my results:

Disorder	Rating	Information
Paranoid:	Moderate	click for info
Schizoid:	High	click for info
Schizotypal:	Very High	click for info
Antisocial:	Low	click for info
Borderline:	Moderate	click for info
Histrionic:	High	click for info
Narcissistic:	Low	click for info
Avoidant:	High	click for info
Dependent:	Very High	click for info
Obsessive-Compulsive:	Moderate	click for info

Well, I can say I don't agree that I'm 'Schizoid' especially cause I'm not 'Antisocial', and I think I'm more 'Borderline' than the test shows.. still other characteristics match more less.
What's your disorder?

Baldly going bald...

I've been told that maybe I should shave my head since I'm going bald anyways.

Maybe I should do so.. maybe not.. I don't know. For start I think it's usually very pretentious and it doesn't look good. At least for white guys. Come on..

Or maybe it's a pride thing. Got to go back to work now :(
Till then, bye bye.

Somethingswrong

There's something's wrong. With me. With the world. Or with my perception of it. We don't quite fit. Something's got to change.

I wish I was a hippy

I wish I was there. In San Francisco.. in 1960s. Whom would I be if I was there.. If I was then. Would I be among those who praised conservative way of living or would I follow the lsd-driven, crazed SF Rock movement. I'd hope the latter.

I've been quiet for last few days.. there has been some tribulations in my life. Instead of working out, things seem to stack up more and more over my head. I can't find peace right now, but I hope I will work it out eventually.

I look up above, and see the gray sky. The winter time makes me sad. I yearn for spring and summer. I want to walk the green forrest. I want to look up and see blue sky. I want to stay up all night to see the sunset and not freeze my butt off. Right now I have to look upon this grey world. Some say winter is white. Snow is, but as soon as it lands on the ground it either melts or gets gray. Maybe mountains are beautiful and peaceful this time of the year, but city is gray, unfriendly and cold wind blowing between buildings adds to the windchill.

It's january. So until mid march I can't expect anything to blossom. It will be 3 or 4 months of this dull misery untill blissful springs sprungs from the ground and chases gray winter away. I hope I will make it till then.. I hope... for once..
Till then, bye bye.